"not me" Monday

being brutally honest and living to tell about it

It has been quite a while since I last participated in "not me" Monday....so I figured it's about time!

I have not been struggling with severe bouts of "pregnancy brain".

I have not been putting perishables in the pantry instead of the fridge, newly packed leftovers in the dishwasher, and forks that look like this in the cabinet with the baking dishes.

My wonderful husband did not sacrificially put aside his Type A personality (once again) while he lovingly showed me said fork he found in the cabinet with the cookie sheets.

I did not wash the same load of laundry 4 times because I kept forgetting to put it in the dryer. In Florida, forgotten wet laundry=smelly laundry.

I do not have my children trained to quickly pick up anything I drop on the floor so I don't have to attempt bending over in my current pregnant state.

I will not burst into tears if one more person exclaims "your kidding!?!" as they gawk at the size of my belly and hear that I have a two months to go before my due date.

I will not scream if one more person asks me "Are you SURE you're not having twins?" (as they gawk at the size of my belly). "Yes ma'am, I'm sure there is only one baby in there...."

I did not naively pose in front of this tree while my husband took a picture, only to realize later that he wanted the shot because he thought it was funny that the tree looked pregnant too....

What did you not do this week?

Not Me! Monday

Welcome to another round of "Not Me! Monday" hosted by MckMama. I love participating in this weekly bit of craziness. More than that, I love reading about all the other things fellow Mommy bloggers "don't do"! Some of them are downright hilarious!

It has not been one month today that we packed up our family with 3 weeks' notice, and moved to Florida for a year. I do not spend waste time each day thinking about the areas of our house I left a mess because I just ran out of time to do it.

As a person who has always thrived on change and adventure I do not unexpectedly find myself having a much harder time adjusting to this move than I ever imagined.

I do not terribly miss my friends and family....especially since when I was in the same city with them we rarely found time to see each other as it was. Being busy and all.

Having spent a lot of time in Florida; I knew what I was in for on all counts...and I really do love it!
Yet, I do not find myself completely.freaked.out by all of the Florida 'wildlife' just outside our door. (Don't get me wrong; I am that woman who actually does like reptiles...it's the other creepy crawlies that get to me....or the fact that there are SO MANY of them!)

My husband is not absolutely loving frequent "bug hunts" with our girls. My sweet little princesses do not go crazy wanting to catch every bug they see now.


I did not have to draw the line on this one...

It does not take everything within me to hide my repulsion and sometimes sheer panic, as I try to act like it's fun to bring these home to leave on the doorstep after dinner...

Or think it's okay that they actually want to pet them...

You can tell by the photo I couldn't even hold the camera still!

I do not beg my husband to let them go (down the street, of course) so that I don't have to do it later doing a silly dance to keep them from jumping on me, embarrassing myself in front of our new neighbors.

I do not cringe at the thought of what else may be lurking in here!
I don't think it is all worth it...the missing loved ones...missing my house...unexpected adjustments...loneliness....and the 'wildlife', when I see moments like these because it really is great here....for all of us!

Happy Monday!

"Not Me! Monday"

Welcome to Not Me! Monday! This blog carnival was created by MckMama. You can head over to her blog to read what she and everyone else have not been doing this week.

We don't need a priest in order to have confession 'round these here parts! MckMama created Not Me! Monday for the purpose of confessing our shortcomings and imperfections to each other since, after all, we are all only human.

On our plate this week.....

While we enjoyed another week in sunny Florida, we did not spend the majority of the past week indoors while the stomach flu ravaged through the ranks. The flu did not hit us one by one, thereby keeping us all trapped in our timeshare for 5 days (5 days that seemed like 45).

Our little ones have complete control their natural reflexes. Therefore, this week was not like a constant recurrence of “that scene from Poltergeist”.

While holding my oldest daughter between vomit sessions (hers and mine), I did not repeatedly say to her “I know sweetie, you’ll feel better soon” while in my mind thinking, “please don’t throw up on me, please don’t throw up on me!”

On a solo late night trip to Walmart, I did not end up turning into the Sea World parking lot by mistake (don’t ask). Because it is all One Way, I did not end up having to drive through what seemed to be miles of lanes and cones in a dark, empty lot all the while wondering how I would explain to my husband how I got stuck in Sea World when I was supposed to be at Walmart. World-traveler that I am, that would never happen to me.

I do not continually neglect my 3 year old’s improper grammar just because I think it is so cute when she insists, “I amn’t!!” (which is her contraction for “I am not”) I would not do that because proper speech is very important to me.

As we stood in line to see “The Lion King” at Disney’s Animal Kingdom, I did not begin to swell up with pride as the people next to us exclaimed how adorable our 3 year old is. I did not then turn and wonder where her right index finger went - oh yeah, it was all the way up her nose!

I’m sure there are many other things I would love to not share with you, but to be honest, we have all been too sick to think 'round here, so stay tuned for more as our minds start to work again!

What did you not do this week?

Not Me! Monday

Well, it's time for our free therapy session! This blog carnival was created by MckMama. You can head over to her blog to read what she and everyone else have not been doing this week.

But, for me....

The internet has not replaced the television as something I could totally be addicted to...if I allowed it. I am not an information junkie who could spend all my time absorbing information, some of it useful, some not so much.

I did not happen upon a ridiculous website where my first thought was who on earth would take the time to compile almost 2000 discarded grocery lists? And even worse, who would take the time to look through them? I did not end up joining the ranks of the ridiculous as I did not spend an inordinate amount of time perusing the same grocery lists I mocked. I did not finally say to myself, "what on earth are you doing?" and shut the computer and go to bed. But, not before copying this one:


I did not prove to myself (and now those on the www) that I really do have a problem...when as writing this post, I did not take just a few more minutes looking at just a few more grocery lists.....what's wrong with me?

My husband's birthday was not last week. It does not feel like a month ago since so much has been going on this week. I did not wake up at 3am to our sweet cocker spaniel running in and out of every room in the house like Taz.

I did not find these remains which explained the craziness:


I did not end up staying awake doing laundry at 3am because I was not at all worried about my dog having eaten chocolate and wanted to make sure she was okay.

I did not insist that my family not walk on the carpet because I finally found the time to vacuum and wanted the floor to stay looking nice. I would never be so silly as to ask my husband if he would please jump from one set of tile to the other so as to only leave one footprint in the middle of the floor.

I did not then move on to figure out how I could keep my family from wearing clothes as well since for the first time since 2001 our clothes hampers are empty......until tomorrow.

What did you not do this week?

Not Me! Monday

One small part of why I began this blog was to join a community of people so that I would have additional motivation and inspiration for my scrapbooking and stamping. Through my SBS group (#23) I have met many new friends that I have grown to treasure - through them I have found much motivation, inspiration and fabulous ideas (check out their VERY creative blogs on my sidebar)…..

Now I just need to join a group that will show me how to add more hours to my day so that I can once again do something with all of the motivation, inspiration and ideas! With that said, here is this week’s episode of “Not Me! Monday”….This weekend, I did not for the umpteenth time say I was going to clean out my scrap room (that my husband so lovingly made for me where at the moment it is impossible to even walk through all the clutter) but didn’t because I wouldn’t try to put off my sanity-savers hobbies until my other “duties” are caught up. (at this rate, I will complete my kids’ baby books while I am sitting in a nursing home at a ripe old age)

I did not already break one of my top New Year’s Resolutions: No More Laundry Couch. I did not on the early date of January 10th use the couch as a long-term laundry holding area. I especially would not do this when I have a perfectly good laundry room intended for folding, sorting and holding of clothes until they are lovingly put away.


I do not find myself using the laundry holding area couch because my laundry room counter more often than not looks like this:


I do not have to go and clear off the couch and organize the laundry room as soon as I'm done with this because if I have time to blog about the mess, I have time to clean up the mess.

I did not against my better judgment get out of bed at 2am and take Nyquil because I knew my cough was keeping my husband awake. I did not regret that decision with all that was in me when our kids woke up at the crack of dawn.

I was not still in my pajamas and robe when my husband stopped by the house at 10am this morning to pick something up. (in my own defense, I had already done a load of laundry-see above-feed the kids breakfast and put dinner in the crockpot – all in my pajamas, but hey)

And finally, when making my to do list for the week, I would never write down all the things I did the day before just so I could cross them off my list and feel more productive. I wouldn’t do that because that would be just plain silly.

Hop on over to MckMama’s blog for more “Not Me!” madness…..

Have a wonderful week!

"Not Me! Monday"

I missed “Favorite Things Friday” this past week, so I thought I’d mix it up a bit.
I am a frequent stalker on “Not Me! Monday” over at MckMama’s blog. Reading through the posts not only adds humor to the dreariest of Mondays, but reminds me that I am not alone in this crazy life we call motherhood. We’re all human, we all do silly things, so why not let others know that they too are not alone?

So here is my first venture into brutal honesty…not!:

Today I did not sit in the drive through at McDonalds, all the while criticizing (in my mind) the girl walking down the street in shorts and the man pumping gas in a t-shirt because they were dressed inappropriately for 34 degree weather…..while I ordered an icy cold milkshake. I did not consequently have to turn up the heater and turn on the seat warmer.

I did not order a milkshake I didn’t even want knowing that apart from the fat grams and calories, it would be the worst thing to drink with my cold & congestion. I did not rationalize it by saying it was worth making my cold worse because it felt SO good on my raw, sore throat.….it was that or a Slurpee. 7-Eleven doesn’t have a drive-thru. McDonalds won.

Sick as a dog, I did not try to get away with feeding my kids animal crackers for breakfast. I did not try to cover my intentions when my husband walked into the kitchen. I did not try to pretend they were just an ‘appetizer’ before the ‘real breakfast’ of eggs and fruit. What kind of Mom gives her babies animal crackers for breakfast? Certainly not me!

I did not finally decide to go to the doctor, get all three kids bundled up, into their car seats, out of their car seats, threaten warn encourage them to behave, drag them into the clinic only to be told a doctor would not see me with my children tagging along. I did not almost cry in the middle of the waiting room. I did not go home and search through the medicine cabinet to see if I could treat myself with a concoction of leftover antibiotics.

I did not go back to the clinic tonight (sans children) and spend 3 hours there. I did not steal take borrow the clinic’s issue of Redbook thinking it served them right for not seeing me and then making me wait that long. I did not take the magazine back in because I felt bad for thinking that and doing that.

I most certainly did not search through “Not Me! Monday” posts to see how many other Moms put their kids to bed without brushing their teeth just so I could feel better about forgetting neglecting to brush my kids’ teeth more often than I’d like to admit.

What did you not do this week?